I feel like a bundle of nerves; exhausted, on edge and chilled. I wish I had more sweaters with me. The xray study went well and everything is in place. (Thank you Jesus) Gideon has been sleeping off the excitement and I've been trying to distract myself with a mediocre detective novel. I keep envisioning the G tube popping out and imagine how that must feel. I can't help but feel a little nauseous.
We have been given the OK to use the G tube again and that we can even try to do a little oral feeding too. It seems that this set back was only temporary. I just hope it doesn't have an impact on the pain management side of things. The nurse brought in a big elastic pressure band to slip around his abdomen. I guess this is to prevent more tubes from popping out. I look at it and wonder if they trust me to move him around. I know this is just the guilt talking, still I can't help but feel a ping of deflation. Like I'm failing in this.
Things will get better.