Friday, 10 April 2015

Put One Foot in Front of the Other

I've been feeling a little deflated lately.  With Gideon's cataracts returning and a phone call from the geneticist letting us know that BOF syndrome has been officially ruled out, it has been hard to stay positive.  It feels like when I talk to people I'm mostly talking about Gideon and the struggles we have been going through.  I'm struggling with the possibility of giving up my career to stay home with my child to give him the extra attention he will need.  I've had to think about where the best services for my child will be found and if it would be wise to move our family.  I've struggled with finding time for myself and time alone with my husband.  In the midst of this, it  is just so hard to hear God's voice, to find inner peace, to feel confident in my decisions and life direction.

Right now the big picture is too much for me to take in.  I have to learn to find pleasure in the little achievements -Baby steps.

Top Ten Mini Achievements that Should Make me Smile:

1.  I finally have a consult lined up with our new ENT for next month
2. I showered this morning and lost the lingering Gideon puke smell (He's been throwing up a lot lately)
3. Gideon didn't throw up his last bottle and so I still don't smell like his spittle
4.  I washed the dishes this morning and have fresh bottles made in the fridge- which made me realize that I'm running low on formula.  Now I have an excuse to put on make-up, brush my hair and get out of the house.
5.  I climbed the Mount Everest laundry pile and put a load in the machine.  Now I just have to tackle the foothills.      
6. I started organizing all my medical/travel expenses for 2014 taxes- receipts are now sorted and paperclipped accordingly
7. I managed to drink a somewhat hot cup of coffee
8. I can fit into my pants today. (Seriously... stress does no favours when trying to fit into the post baby wardrobe)
9. I scored a beautiful Easter Lily at discount for only 2.99  
10. Last Sunday, Alex brought me a picture he did in Sunday school and excitedly told me the Easter story. It was precious!  I tucked his picture away today so I can bring out again next year.

Did you have any mini achievements that helped you propel through the day?

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