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Wednesday 24 January 2018

Letter to Myself for 2018

Dear Me,

Get ready to dance!

This is the year you will dance round the house. Holding it together with soft padded steps, while keeping up with the stomping of your 5 year old and the tumbling's of your weakened youngest. Try your best to side step with gentleness and patience, during the tantrums and melt downs. You've got this!

Tip toe lightly around the many puddles of puke and don't crack under pressure when the dietitian pressures you to keep your son's weight up. Try to leave your anxiety backstage as you struggle with his G-tube and the inevitable pneumonias. There will be hospital admissions, but remember you have a backup dancer who is amazing! Let him take front stage once in a while. 

Monkey wrenches will be thrown your way but you are light on your feet. Some you will avoid, others will hit you. Just remember that there is a choreographer, who knows the routine and will teach you the steps. Please take the time to learn the steps.

Slow dance in the kitchen with your husband. Hold each other and whisper "It's all going to be OK". Try to believe it.

Watch your 5 year old break dance and twirl round the room. Join in once in a while. Find joy in these simple moments that won't last forever. Remember that one day he might not want to dance with you, so do it while you can. 

Keep hope and find encouragement in the slow steady rhythm your special one dances to. His dance is hard. So unfairly hard. Feel confident in your role. You are doing the best you can. 

So remember to dance. Dance through the joy, the sorrow, the pain. One step at a time. 

Love, Joy and Blessings,

Me

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